Time is such a crazy thing. When you are waiting for the end of the work day, it drags, but when you are spending time with a close friend, hours can pass in what feels like minutes.
It has been over 3 months now since my surgery, and I am down about 65 pounds. I am less than 5 months away from my wedding, and exactly 7 days from completing my first 5K. It is quite amazing to see how much my life has changed.
Today, I spent almost 3 hours outside working in the yard. For those of you who do not actually know me, you would not imagine that is a big deal, but for this girl it really is. I have always said that I don't do manual labor, but now that I am physically capable of doing it, I can see that it was simply a way to not being embarassed by my inability. Sound strange? Yeah, to be on this side of it, I can see it as well. When you are over 330 pounds, standing at 5 foot 4, it is about coping. Yes, the fresh air will do me good, I have heard it a million times, but the emotional cost of being seen as the weak link was simply unbearable. It was much easier to just take myself out of the situation.
It feels good to live. I listened to my app that was telling me how long it I was "walking" for, and even, and every 5 minutes that passed, I had to smile to myself, because I was still okay. I did not once have to sit down and rest, nor did I come up with an excuse to go inside and disapear. Instead, I walked from once side of the house to the other, dragging branches. All in all, I walked over 3.1 miles before my phone died.
I have lost so many moments hiding from the things that I couldn't do. Now, I will do all that I can for every second that I can enjoy with my family, friends, and anything else that comes along in my future.
